Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize