I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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