We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just forgot I was standing up.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
