you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
