Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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