I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
