In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
