She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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