You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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