Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
