in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
