How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize