ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
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there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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