How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is wine microwaveable?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize