Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize