She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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