Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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