at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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