Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize