What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
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This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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