there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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