Whatcha textin bout Willis?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
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Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
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Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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