who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I am spending my child support on dildos
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
