Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
