dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
