I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize