i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Randomize