we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
