i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
