do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize