It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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