so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize