the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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