i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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