okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
