That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
