hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Man, jail baloney is awful.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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