Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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