He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
