Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize
