we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
My butt remains clenched, sir.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
