Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.

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(313): View more from Michigan

i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.

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(352): View more from Florida

Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.

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(951): View more from California

Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.

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(812): View more from Indiana

We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.

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(712): View more from Iowa

Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.

Fav 4 346 571
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