I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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