I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
