There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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