I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I have demons in me.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize