Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.