why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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