Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
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and i looked up. we had an audience...
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
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Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
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