K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
