Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize