Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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