I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
false alarm, still single
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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